Happy birthday Nicholas!!

Today is your THIRTIETH birthday. Thirty. Man, you are OLD. But you know what, you have achieved some remarkable things these past thirty years. Sure, you've had your troubles - some that aren't over yet - but I think you are stronger because of it.

Thank you for being my big brother. I may be biased, but I think you've done a fabulous job. You protected me from all the bad things that went bump in the night when I was a kid - even from the monsters that you made up to scare us. I know now that there is no such thing as a wall rat. But even still, you kept me safe from it. You have shown be the importance of working hard and not being discouraged when things don't go the way I want them to go. And, I am pretty positive that you taught me every swear word that I know. You are currently about two hours away but I have no doubt that if I needed you, you would be here. In an hour and a half. You have made a special mark on everyone that has had the privilege of knowing you and I am honored to be your sister.



I pray that the next thirty years be filled with love, happiness, and success. I know they will be. Next year, you will marry the love of your life. Soon, you'll have that degree and we'll stop pestering you. Then, you'll reach that bar you've set for yourself in your career and be set for life. I know that you will succeed in every aspect of your life as long as keep the same determination and focus that you have now. After all, you and I, dear brother, are the more equal pigs.

As Seen in Shreveport: Mardi Gras Edition

As you know, this was the first Mardi Gras season that I've lived in North LA in three years. Baton Rouge isn't exactly New Orleans, but it seems like BR people get way more excited about MG than Shreveport people do. Though, Shrevers (that's what I just decided to call people who live in Shreveport) get more pumped about MG than those in Northeast Louisiana. Maybe that's just my opinion, but there definitely a difference. For example, Monroe has one MG parade. Shreveport has several. That's really the only difference I can think of right now.

Wait.

I thought of another difference.

This house.

Complete with inflatable jester.

Never before have I seen such a display in NELA. Heck, I don't think I've seen anything similar ever.

You can't see it, but a Lexus lives in this house's driveway. Proof positive that you can't buy class.

P.S. I'm giving up sweets for Lent. Prepare for crabbiness.

P.P.S. Sorry about the spacing. I don't know how to fix it.

Insert creative title here.

Make sure it has something to do with Mardi Gras because this post is Mardi Gras related. In fact, I'll "tag it" that way so everyone knows in case you, the creator of the title, fail to properly identify this post.

Here I sit, in my hotel room in the sprawling metropolis of Metarie, Louisiana, taking a break from preparing to kick part of the Louisiana Bar Exam's be-hinny tomorrow. I know, I had better pass it this time around.

Anyway, I'm not really posting anything of consequence, but I did want to show off my Mardi Gras wreath. After all, for every wreath there is a season. Or maybe that should be "for every season there is a wreath." Whatever.

Back to the point of this non-post.

This fabulous decorative piece was hand-crafted by several master artisans. The legendary Marla painstakingly wrapped the attractive ribbon around a base of post-consumer, recycled, straw formed in a ring for the traditional wreath shape. The groupings of the themed faces of jesters was then affixed by melting a glue-like substance and using a pressure-method to bond the shapes to the form. The mask was custom-selected for this project by Matt, reputed art lover and craftsman, and sits at a considerable angle on the wreath form in order to be aesthetically-pleasing. The three strands of gold, purple, and green beads are the traditional "throws" from a float in a Mardi Gras parade and are the primary support for a king's crown. The crown was contributed to the project through the support of Marla. At the bottom of the form is a representation of a saxophone which signifies the primary city associate with the MG, New Orleans. No, NOLA is not the birthplace of Mardi Gras, but it might as well be.

So here it is:

I know, you are wildly jealous and want one for yourself. Sorry folks, this masterpiece is one of a kind and not for sale.

Perhaps, if you are very talented and able to go to Hobby Lobby, you can make a similar one for your own door.

Tara: 1, Giselle: 5,436

I knew that when Matt got a dog in April of 2009, that our lives would never be the same. To use a phrase from a horrendous piece of pop culture - our lives were "unconditionally and irrevocably" changed. (Google just the part in quotes and you'll know what I'm talking about - if you don't already...) On the one hand, I was happy about it. Matt would have a companion and wouldn't be lonely. Dogs are fun and they provide entertainment, you know, like children provide entertainment. But on the other hand, I was a little anxious. I mean, dogs require a lot of care and attention. Plus, what if the dog didn't like me or if (gasp!) Matt liked the dog more than me?

I'm sure you would have understood my fears.

Through the past couple years, I've been pleasantly surprised by his "puppy." Sure, there were the tinkle-accidents when people came to visit and the handful of attempts to run away from home, but for the most part, it's been a pleasant experience. Since I came in to the picture on a permanent domicilary basis, she's gone through a rebellious stage. Just the standard "new woman in the picture" stuff - chewing up one of my beloved Harry Potter books, frolicking on the couch when no one was looking, eating my parents' oak door, refusing to eat, ignoring me, you know, the normal things. But now that I've shown her that I am here to stay, G and I are getting along famously. Or so I thought.


Last week, I decided that the dog had to have a bath. It costs about $30 to have it professionally done and since I'm a tight-wad, I decided to do it myself. I've bathed Giselle once before and it was a tramatizung experience for us both. She hated it. [Note: when I say "bath" I really mean shower. As in outside with the water hose. I am so not letting her hairy paws into my bathtub. You must be crazy.] She tried to escape, she rolled on the ground (which was actually mud) so that I couldn't spray her, she had some bladder control problems. It was awful. But last week, things got to be too much. I just couldn't handle her corn-chip-smelling-self anymore. Plus, she's shedding like crazy and I'd almost had it. As in, shave her, had it, but I don't think Matt will go for it so I opted for the bath.


Anyway, I got all the bath stuff out and ready. And then I got the dog. I put a simple rope leash around her neck and put my foot through the hand hold so she'd be attached to me and I'd have both hands free. She did just fine until I turned on the water hose. I knew she'd try to make a break for it, so I was ready. She jetted out into the yard - or at least she would have had I not cleverly used a leash and attached it to my leg. The little deliquent didn't go anywhere. Ha. I knew she was nervous so I used my calming voice and told her about how pretty she was going to look and how much her daddy liked seeing her clean and not smelling her. She just stood there while I sprayed her with the hose and lathered her all up with doggie shampoo. She did shake a few times, but that just can't be helped. I don't know if you caught it, but she STOOD there. She didn't lay down, she didn't crouch, she STOOD! It was perfect. I got her all washed off and mostly towel dried and all she did (other than initial escape attempt) was shake off the water. Praise Jesus.


I let her spend some quality time outside after her bath so that she could dry some more in the sun. And then, I let her inside.


And she stared at me.


For hours.



No matter where I went.



She would follow me and stare. If I sat, she would sit and stare. If I stood, she would stand and stare.


For hours.


I call it the "Stare of Loathing." Here, I took a picture. I mean, it wasn't hard getting her to look at me or anything.





And then, her daddy got home and the staring stopped. That always happens, she acts like a perfect angel when Matt is around, but the second he's gone, she's a hellhound.

Thank goodness Matt's home for a few days otherwise I'd have to break out the celestial bronze. But still. All in all, I think I won this round.

Made it to Day 7!

It's been a remarkable year already for me in 2012! I've stuck to my resolutions and have actually been productive! I know, you are all very impressed.

Create budget. Check.

Eat better, exercise more, blah blah blah. Doing very well on that. I don't want to see "check" because it's not finished yet.

Pass the bar. Not checked, but working on it. More to come in April.

Haven't seen my parents so no check.

Haven't been a better wife. In fact, a few days ago Matt got awfully sick in Baton Rouge and I didn't go take care of him. He said he didn't want me to come, but I should have gone anyway. He was obviously so sick that his mind was affected and he didn't know what he was saying.

Crafty? Heck yes. Marla and I started making a Mardi Gras wreath last night and hung it this morning. It still needs one more thing so it isn't done, but it's pretty stinking cute.

I haven't really read any books, but I'm forcing myself not to read non-bar related materials. Something about REALLY wanting to pass thebar this time...

I think I've been pretty good about being less judgmental in the past few days. I can't think of the last time I thought something mean about someone. If I have thought something mean and said it outloud, don't remind me because I'm quite proud of myself.

We (as in Marla, Margaret, and I) tried out some new recipes this week!! We're doing great on that score with another new recipe planned for this week.

Am I less anxious? I'm trying not to think about things. Surely that will help with calming my fears if I just dont' think about it. I guess I'm trying to be more Scarlett about things and deal with March 16th tomorrow. Or the next day. Or the next.

I promise, the next post will be about something fun and NOT about my silly resolutions.

I'm skipping Christmas... and heading straight to New Years.

That's right, I haven't posted since late November. What can I say, life has been busy. And, more so, I've had a bit of a writer's block. The block is still there, but I'm trying to forge my way through it. I've never been one for New Year's resolutions. Sure, I'll think about it, maybe "make" a few, but come January 5th or so, I'm out with the new and back to the old. They say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. If that's the case, I'm already on the right to track to fixing my inability to be resolute about my resolutions. (ha, see what I did there?)

In order to help me remember and have some sort of accountability (even if it is virtual), I've decided to list a few of my resolutions. Perhaps, by the end of the year I'll have stuck to some of them and maybe checked off a few things on my list to become a better person.

1. I really would like to eat better, exercise more, and be a bit healthier. Perhaps if I get serious about it, it'll be easier to help that husband o' mine to get serious about it too.

2. I'd really really really like to pass the bar this time around.

3. I want to critize less, judge less, and bite my tongue more.

4. I want to be good at being crafty. My mom has this special knack for making any craft she puts her hands on be perfect. I have this knack for subpar construction (mostly due to my lack of patience) that I detest. I'm going to work on my patience and learn to be a better crafter.

5. I want to be a better wife. I'm not sure what all that entails just yet, but I'm going to work on it.

6. I want to go see my parents more often this year.

7. I want to be less anxious about the future and enjoy the way things are now. 2012 is going to be year full of new adventures and I want to be able to enjoy them without worrying.

8. I want to make a budget and stick to it. In fact, I think I'll make that budget this weekend. It'll be accurate through June at least. After that, there's no telling.

9. Read more!! Well, perhaps I should say read more different books. I need to put HP and P&P on the shelf and read other things. Real things, books of consequence. Well hello Kindle for Christas, aren't you going to be handy.

10. Learn to cook new things and organize my recipe collection. I can do that. It'll be fun AND delicious. Oh look, a trip to Office Depot may be in order. Shame.

Okay, I'm done. Ten resolutions that seem do-able. January 1st, I'm so ready for you. I guess January 6th will be the real test...

Thanksgiving 2011

I've noticed that November seems to be the month of lot of things on the Facer. No-shave November, pleas for new Thanksgiving side dish ideas, oh, and football. I don't think I can open my home page without seeing someone comment on something football related. I've also seen statuses of people stating one thing each day for which they are thankful. I don't get on FB everyday so I didn't feel inclined to join the Thanks movement. Instead, I decided that I would make my list and post it for Thanksgiving thereby allowing me to publicly state my gratitude AND fulfill my weekly post obligation that I've promised myself. So, here goes, in absolutely no particular order. I tried to make it all rhyme, but failed. I'm only doing 24 because Thanksgiving is on the 24th this year. If you don't like it, feel free to add in your own.

1. I'm thankful for having another year to give thanks.
*I know, that's a lame way to start, but I couldn't help it.

2. I'm thankful for completing law school. No, it didn't go as well as I had planned, but I did it. I wish I could say that having a law degree is rare and special, but I'd be lying. It seems like everyone and their mom has a law degree these days. Yay for jumping on the bandwagon.

3. I'm thankful for a job. Not all of my law school friends have jobs and I couldn't be happier about mine. I get to work in an area that I like and am familiar with. Some days I am good at what I do, some days, I am not. But hey, I'm still learning. As they say, it only goes up from here.

4. I'm thankful that Matt and I are finally married. It was years in the making, from before our births, I guess, and now it has finally happened. We couldn't be happier. Nope, that doesn't need an exclamation mark. It's a statement of fact. Yes, there are strong feelings involved, but the period won out in my mental debate of which form of punctuation to use.

5. I'm thankful for my mom. She and I have had our differences over the years, but when I need her most, she's always there. She orchestrated the perfect wedding. Nothing could have made it better. I'm thankful that our relationship is now that of two adults. While she is still my mom and I call her every so often for motherly advice, for the most part our calls are just to chat, not find out the best way to cook potatoes.

6. I'm thankful for Marla. We are both very different than we were six or seven years ago, but essentially, we are still the same. I'm logical and at times, boring. She's spontaneous and fun. I think we've always been that way and will always be that way. She kind of evens out my seriousness and I (like to think) keep her in check. Like we've always said, if we were one person, we'd be perfect and far too much for anyone to handle. And. I'm thankful that she's graduating in May. Dr. Mar is almost official!!

7. I'm thankful for having been able to spend time with my mamaw and nanny here on Earth. They are both gone now, but I'll never forget them. The holidays are hard without them, but we carry on their traditions. Christmas isn't Christmas without someone using a Saltines box as gift packaging. Thanksgiving isn't Thanksgiving without rolls - they don't have to be homemade, they just have to be delicious.

8. I'm thankful for Daddy!! He always knows the right thing to say to make me feel better. He is the backbone of the Jordan family and we'd all be lost without him. The guitar-strumming, firewood cutting, fantastic-bench-making backbone.

9. I'm thankful for Nicholas. He has decided to bite the bullet and get his degree. I'm hoping the spring or summer. AND... he is getting MARRIED in 2013. Trust me, that isn't that long away. Laura Beth is going to spend Thanksgiving with the Jordan family. I hope she is ready because we tend to get a little loud.

10. Jeffrey and Kat have a baby!! His name is Henry. Even though I've only spend about five minutes with that bundle of goodness, I'm pretty sure that he's perfect. Jeff is still working hard and Kat is completely occupied with Henry. I'm glad that they are ready for that, because I am not.

11. I'm thankful for having the Margarets in Shreveport. From crafting to Top Model, I've loved being able to spend non-law related time with y'all!

12. I'm thankful that Judith is almost done with everything. I'm glad that Kyle's diabetes is under control. And, I'm ready for a Roberts baby. But I can wait until y'all are ready. Also, I'd like to be an "aunt" to said Roberts baby.

13. I'm thankful for having fantastic friends like Ash and Jada from high school. We certainly were a handful back then, and some things haven't changed. I still can't believe that Jada has kids and the older of the two is nearly four! Just imagine what changes will take place by this time next year. Crazy.

14. I'm thankful for the washer and the dryer. I admit, being the one in charge of the laundry has goes in 'cycles' of fun (get it!), but there's no way I'd willingly do more than I have to by hand. Thank you Mr. Fisher!

15. I'm thankful for Giselle. No, we haven't always seen eye to eye, but she kept Matt company for the past three years and has made him happy. She may not say much, but she does the darndest things. Including barking at 5 this morning. Thanks G. Really.

16. Papaw!! I'm so glad that he is with Mom and Dad now. He's less lonely. We don't worry about him being on his own as much. Mom can take care of his needs (with a little help). But most importantly, he isn't alone anymore. He gets to be a part of everything in the Jordan house. AND, he doesn't have to travel for the holidays! He's already at the hottest place in town. Over the years I've learned a lot from him. Like how silence is a good thing. How showing true character isn't always what you say, but how you act.

17. I'm thankful for all the support Matt's parents have given us over the past few months and the upcoming few. That fourth year of medical school is a whopper on the back account. They've let Matt borrow their car for a month to drive to and from Georgia. They've given Matt a place to stay while he is off pursuing his dream. And they've given me peace of mind. That's a lot for me, a planner.

18. I'm thankful for the colder weather that is bound to come and stay for a bit. I like low electric bills and snuggling. Notice, I said stay for a bit. This little breeze isn't going to last.

19. As mentioned in my last post, I'm thankful for chocolate. I'm so glad that there's something material that loves me as much as I love it. I mean, once I eat it, it never leaves. Just look at my hips!

20. I'm thankful that Christmas is coming. I really like Thanksgiving, but Christmas is my favorite. I love the music, the decorations, the extended family time. And of course, the reason behind it all. I love hearing the Christmas story and knowing that little baby Jesus grew into the ultimate sacrifice for me. That's something to be thankful for, for sure.

21. I'm thankful for my health. In this day and time when injury and illness seems to run rampant, I'm glad that I am healthy. The prognosis looks great for a long and happy life.

22. Kind of like Giselle, I'm thankful for Emma. She has made Nicholas happier just by being there. I'm glad that he has her and I'm looking forward to meeting her tomorrow!!

23. I've been waiting for this number! Matt, I'm so thankful for you, and not just because you wash the dishes. I'm thankful and incredibly blessed to have you in my life. The past few years have been tough, but we're done with them. We're (finally) married and will get to see each other almost every day of our lives. Granted, some of those days may be through Skype, but still. I wouldn't have traded the past for anything and am loving the present. Our future is going to be incredible.

24. I'm thankful for K-Love. I listen to it almost every time I'm in my car, and it really does make me happier. Sometimes the stories make my cry, but the songs fill my heart with joy. I'm a huge fan K-Love, just not during the pledge drives...

Alright, done.

Happy Thanksgiving!!