Though the title probably failed, I wanted to convey a similarity between the upcoming post and the greeting at Alcoholics Anonymous. Not that I know from personal experience, I've just seen a lot of movies. Today was a day of self-realization. I am a judger. In other words, I judge people. Before I get to know them. If people were books, I'd be judging them by their covers. Too cliche'? I know, I'm just all sorts of fail today. That's okay though, I've accepted it. Also, I baked a flourless chocolate cake. Trust me, that cake, more like a torte, makes everything better. Even failure.
Here's the recipe: http://www.pillsbury.com/recipes/chocolate-glazed-fudge-cake/bfb2a9aa-7dc5-4587-97d9-f2174b7ae35f/
- note, if you decide to try this, remember to temper the eggs before adding all of them to the melted chocolate and butter mixture. The directions don't say to do that, but you should. Again, trust me.
But back to the point. For the past couple weeks I've been preparing for a disciplinary hearing of a fellow law student for which I, along with three professors and one other student, had to decide if he was guilty and if so, the proper punishment (most likely expulsion). I reviewed pages and pages of letters, applications, and written statements. From this study, I painted a picture of, for lack of a better word, the defendant. In my mind, he basically looked like an chaos-spreading ogre who barely deserved to live in a cage-free environment, much less be in law school. The hearing was today and last night I barely slept because I was so nervous about the hearing. I mean, I was just a few hours away from ruining this ogre's life. After my first class today, I decided to look back over the documents again before the hearing. I did, intensively. Though I had read them before, this time, I looked for something different. Both sides of the story.
After three hours and my ten-pages of my own notes (not to mention highlighting, it is basically a habit now. I can't read anything serious without a highlighter.), my mental picture got a little less menacing. In fact, I was starting to think that this kid was more like an unruly pigmy goat (you know, the ones that faint) than an ogre. After finishing my review of the evidence, if you will, I was even more nervous than before. I was doubting my original thoughts. For me, this is bad. Doubting usually gets me wrong answers, missed parking spaces, and references to a certain Biblical character. I'm pretty certain that I was more nervous than the ogre/goat before the hearing. Once it started and the witnesses and defendant gave their testimonies and our questions were answered, I realized that my original thoughts weren't just a little wrong, they were a lot wrong. I took the information compiled by a very scared goat and turned him into an ogre. I judged him before I heard his side. I tried him, convicted him, and hung him before he opened his mouth. I shouldn't have done that. I can't say that I won't do it again. I don't always succeed (see opening paragraph), but I'm going to try to listen more and make decisions only after hearing as many sides as possible. I'm going to try. Granted, the goat wasn't exactly an lamb; maybe a crossbreed of goat and ogre. Like an ogregoat or goatogre. Either way. It is a good thing for him that I'm on the Ethics Committee and not on the Admissions Committee. But that's beside the point.
Also beside the point, leggings with a short shirt still merit harsh judgment. It is never a good idea. Ever.
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